questionswhat would you do if these were your sons?

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vote-for27vote-against

My dog behaves better than that. They should all be neutered.

Seriously, when is that ok? What a bunch of d-bags.

vote-for41vote-against

If my kid had ever displayed such dishonorable, ignorant, malicious behavior, he'd have had a hard time sitting for awhile, would have had to make a public apology, and would have lost any privileges for quite awhile.

vote-for36vote-against

Ummmm......no worries here. My kids were taught to be civilized, not future criminals. I only saw the first 1-1/2 minutes of the video, but that was enough. To hell with the whole PC thing, if they were my kids there would be some serious ass-busting going on after this.

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We are in the downfall of society my friends. Everybody has the right to do and say whatever they want. The scumbag lawyers have made sure that precedent has been set to allow them to do so. Used to be you could handle these situations on your own. Now you have to worry about video and media. This poor lady shouldn't have to take that. It's disgusting that parents don't teach their kids better manners. My freind recently had an issue where someone was stealing property from his yard in front of him and he tried to stop the guys. Cops arrested him for assault. When he asked what he should have done to not get arrested, they said he should have just called the cops. So basically re-enforce letting people steal your stuff. Awesome world we're living in.

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I'd be mortified. Sadly, people are blaming the school and teachers for letting this happen. The blame lies with the kids, and the parents for raising such kids.

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i'd be glad to put up with it for the large chunk of change that woman has coming to her. doesn't make it right of course, but half a million dollars (and growing) goes a long ways. donate now or you don't have a heart ok

http://www.indiegogo.com/loveforkarenhklein?c=home&a=744576

vote-for15vote-against

Wow, I couldn't even get to a minute! Seriously, what the hell is wrong with kids these days? Oh, I know, they are raised without being taught respect, manners, and have no consequences for bad actions. If they were my kids, I would seriously beat them. Then make them apologize, and put their butts to work with the elderly (in a nursing home if I had to)!

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nice downvotes. i pitched in $20...what'd you contribute cheapskate?

vote-for11vote-against

I would be horrified if my child were to participate in this type of disgusting, rude, unforgiveable behavior. I'd like to see them all have to spend 60 (of at least 4 hours a day) days doing community service in a place that's not so nice; perhaps the State mental health facility or a children's cancer ward. Then, they would apologize, publicy to this lady. Someone earlier mentioned lawyers; I don't see what they have to do with this; it's simply cruel behavior.

vote-for7vote-against

Disgusting. I couldn't imagine speaking to an adult like that when I was a teenager. What really gets me heated is that there's really nothing the woman can do. Taking the high road and not retaliating is lost on those kids because they're too "brave" to let up. If she'd responded with verbal assaults, it would have spurred them on even more. And we ALL know the outcome if she'd been in a position to get physical with them.

Incidents like this make me never want to have kids. Every day I see examples of our society going down the drain. I can't imagine how much worse things will be twenty years from now, and would never want to expose something as important to me as my children to that environment.

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Saw that earlier today. Disgusting, but not surprising. Permissive Parenting at its best.

I'd like to think that my boys would never ever do that, because we are raising them to be respectful of everyone, much less adults.

One thing I wonder, though - isn't it the job of the bus monitor to PREVENT bullying such as this? What exactly does a "bus monitor" do? You'd think she'd do something besides sit there and take it.

vote-for7vote-against

@tsfisch: I was thinking the same thing about the bus monitor's role. Then the cynical side of me figured she's probably there to divert all that abuse away from the bus driver so that he can concentrate on driving.

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@tsfisch: I saw an interview with her and she said she could have written them up but she feels it's pointless as nothing is done to the children after a report anyway many times. It looks like she's just frustrated and stuck in a bad situation with little recourse or ability to effect any change. Well, was anyway. Now, things will be different as the school actually seems to be taking this seriously.

vote-for13vote-against

Just appalling. Respect for our elders is still being taught here and if we ever heard or caught our child doing something like this, she would pray for a time machine to materialize. There is just no situation where treating someone this way is acceptable. We try to teach our daughter to be empathetic and to know that it is ok to be different (whether fat, tall, sporty, geeky, etc) and that how we treat others is important.

From the looks of how awful these kids were behaving, it seems the parents never taught, nor practice the Golden Rule. I hope the parents take responsibility for what their kids did.

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A part of me blames technology. I think we have all witnessed or been victimized by some sort of bullying in the past. I don't think that kids have changed THAT much. I have a feeling that if someone weren't filming the whole thing, the kids would have stopped a lot sooner. We certainly didn't carry around "instant fame" gadgets when we were kids. The camera phone/facebook/youtube thing must have contributed to longevity and depth of the event. I'm not blaming technology, mind you. The parents should be ashamed. I'm just saying that kids have been brutal for a LONG time and now they have an audience.

vote-for8vote-against

Two thoughts:

As a parent I would be mortified. I would seriously have to consider moving to a different city (far away) I would be so ashamed for my child and the way that I raised him. I wouldn't be able to face friends and neighbors with them knowing how badly I failed at child rearing. Unfortunately, I'm sure that the parents in question are wondering why everybody is so upset.

The child needs some very serious punishment. I would like to say a severe beating, but I don't think that would do it. Maybe get these three asshats, put them in prison garb then have them pick up trash and cut weeds all summer by the side of the road. Have a big sign explaining who they are, and encourage passers by to stop and give them a piece of their minds. That might turn them around and give them a shot at become human beings. But I'm not hopeful.

vote-for15vote-against

What would I do if these were my kids?

* Review the video with the kid bit by bit to drive home what was done wrong.
* Verbal AND written apology to the monitor in front of the entire school.
* No electronics for the foreseeable future.
* Serious community service time.

A beating might make me feel better, but probably wouldn't do too much to change their minds about bullying.

I've been on the other side of this too many times. My son (now 26) has Asperger's Syndrome and was bullied throughout his school years. His challenges would not have been so, well, challenging had these kids just left him alone. Every time he had a behavioral issue it was the direct result of being bullied. I've worked with anti-bullying programs and want to point out that even those kids who did NOT participate should be counselled. Bystanders should be taught to to intervene on behalf of the victim. Not only is it the right thing to do, it is empowering!

/off soapbox

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@pinchecat: I pitched in absolutely nothing. If she doesn't like it, she shouldn't be a professional baby-sitter. Of course, that doesn't mean she deserves that kind of treatment. And, I did upvote your initial post.

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I like the idea floating around of banning them from school sports for a year (if they do participate). It's a harsh, appropriate punishment.

vote-for4vote-against

Now you have to worry about video and media.
Video goes both ways. It has become the regulator. No need for Big Brother, we have "Little Sister" to tattle on us.
In this case, there would have been no evidence of the kid's actions had they not been recorded in some fashion. This is especially important to show delusional parents how their "little angles" actually behave, otherwise they won't believe it.

j5 j5
vote-for8vote-against

@belyndag: I said the same thing when I saw this video earlier today; I think the fact that the other children just sat by and said nothing speaks even more about their generation.

Anyway, I keep wondering what I would do if I had kids like this one day. The problem is that beating them probably won't change their outlook; they chose to pick on someone who was defenseless, so by showing them to respect me simply because I'm stronger, I probably wouldn't get the right result.

I think I would review the video and break down each point. They have to understand that life has consequences. As such, I would ensure that, after I showed them why what they did was so wrong, I would make darn sure that they can relate. I would put them in that role of not having funds. They would be poor until they learn why you should help the less fortunate instead of mocking them. I would also show them the effects of bullying and try to turn them into protectors of the weak, instead of persecutors.

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@cruelnv: And what if the other kids did intervene? We've taught them that anything goes as long as your self esteem is upheld. So these other children's self esteem relies on them being a blight on society, but what do you expect when you cultivate that value to such an extreme?

Honestly it's at the point where it's a question of, "what do you expect?" Those bystanders will always act like that when they're taught bad values, they won't when you teach them that self-esteem takes a back seat to treating other people with respect and that self-actualization plays second fiddle to a society that values other people just as much, if not more, than one's self.

We have a society where you're told not to defend yourself but wait for some authority figure to arrive to defend you in the case of crime, so of course that line of thinking promulgates down throughout the social structure. And here it reinforces why that's a bad idea: look what happens when the authority gets undermined.

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@benyust2: Maybe, but I'm kind of guessing that she has that position because she doesn't have many options. It's clearly not for the money considering she only made $15,500... that's $4,000 over poverty level for a single person. Think about it, she's 68 and probably not able to do much physically. For all we know, she could have been forced into an early retirement and is simply trying to make ends meet. Sometimes you take what you can get...

Regardless, there is no reason ANYONE in this position should have to put up with smug, disrespectful children that don't know a thing about the real world bullying an elder.

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@figgers3036: @cruelnv:
No, it's not "this generation" stood by and did nothing, it's more likely the Bystander Effect
10 horrible examples

j5 j5
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Well obviously their parents aren't qualified to be parents. Kids these days are just raised so much differently. I swear they control their parents, not the other way around.

But what I would do if I were the school is I would take all of the kids involved and make them sit in a room with the lady they abused. I would invite the media along and play the ENTIRE video unedited with everyone in the room. The embarrassment/awkwardness that this would cause would no-doubt bring them to tears. Not to mention knowing they were being recorded and not being able to hide behind some internet username would add a better kick. Of course though, because they're "children" this would be cruel so it probably won't happen. They'll get suspended from school and go on living the same life.

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@j5: You might be right, but I have personally seen and been involved in instances where one person's voice gets others to speak out as well. Unfortunately, as many of the stories on your list seem to also indicate, I'm afraid it's not due to fear that the other kids didn't respond, but simply that they didn't care enough.

My point with the generational comment is that I fear this is the direction where things are heading; I'm afraid that more and more of today's youth are going to care less and less about others. Maybe it's because my largest exposure to their generation is via the internet where everyone hides behind a mask of anonymity, but I fear that people are losing their empathy.

To be fair, I don't know if that's true or not. I certainly hope it isn't.

vote-for5vote-against

I absolutely do not condone the behavior in ANY way. BUT I also don't think the kids and their families should be getting death threats.

They are kids after all, and obviously need to be taught more than manners. Still not deserving of thousands of death threats.

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@mustardsquarepants: Death threats are a [GIFT](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greater_Internet_(profanity)wadTheory#Inpopular_culture) of the Internet.

j5 j5
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Some follow-up:

http://www.cnn.com/2012/06/21/us/new-york-bullied-bus-monitor/index.html

CNN's "AC360" received statements from two of the middle schoolers and the father of a third student apologizing for their behavior. Statements (especially if written) are pretty weak in my opinion.

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I really don't know what to say about it. Watching just the first minute made me so horribly, horribly sad for humanity.

vote-for2vote-against

I feel the same way watching this video as I did when reading Lord of the Flies. Children can be monstrous, especially in packs, that's nothing new. But in recent decades we have disempowered those who were once able to check this type of behavior. The fact that they even ventured so far as to touch her, to threaten to come to her home and kill her, shows that these kids are off the rails. If one of them was mine, we'd be moving as quickly as possible. Not because I blame the school, but because I think the most effective opportunity to change a person is to change everything around them. Honestly, I don't know if it is possible to teach empathy to an adolescent, if they haven't learned it by that age they may well be sociopaths.