questionshow do you deal with rage?


Would it be a horrible thing to go out there one time with the intent of being angry and bitter and yelling and screaming and listening the Imperial March on repeat? Sometimes getting over something requires allowing yourself to feel the rage, to deal with it and experience it, get it out of your system and all that.
As long as you don't do anything to actually hurt anyone (maybe take an understanding friend who can help ensure this?) it might be just what you need.


i find that kicking a puppy helps. afterwards, whilst i'm cooling off in the local jail, the shame and embarrassment of allowing some stupid incident in the past control my life usually helps me let go of the rage. also the joy from hurting something cute and defenseless.

no1 no1

@gt0163c: This is what I'm planning. But I think it's important to note that I have no intention of hurting anyone or anything. I'm just angry and want to learn how to enjoy that space again without being angry.


@curli76: I didn't mean to imply that you might be planning on hurting yourself or another person. Although rereading I can see where it could be taken that way. I was more wanting to ensure that you had adequate support if you should get out of hand in your grief/anger/dealing with bad stuff...rage is a strong word. Also, sometimes it's nice to have someone else to run interference should others come across you in mid scream/stomp/tantrum. Someone to ensure people that they've got your back and you're not going to do anything stupid, you're just working through some stuff, move along, these aren't the droids you're looking for sort of thing.


I usually just quit.

To be clear, is this event something that happened to you at this site or to someone else?
(I'm picturing a horrible breakup or similar)
I guess the best thing is to create a counter event at this location that replaces the bad one in your memories

j5 j5

@gt0163c: Thanks. I do have someone.
For the record, I moved into an apartment in uptown Manhattan in 2010 that had bedbugs. I lived with them for 5 kind of excruciating, exhausting months before breaking my lease. The experience changed me and made pre-existing OCD issues worse--and instead of getting better with time, they've gotten worse still. Things that remind me of that experience are big emotional triggers for me--everything from the A train to the Palisades to hardwood floors to just seeing the initials bb.

Since then, I've had a hard time going anywhere North of the GW bridge. I recently started therapy to try to ease my way out of these fears, but I realized two things:
1) I'm just as angry as I am scared, if not more.
2) I really want to sidestep some of the baby steps (right now I'm supposed to just practice riding the A train between 59th and 125th street) and see if I can go there and work out some of the anger.


Thanks for sharing that with us. Sounds like you are headed in the right direction. Might take some time, but hang in there. Don't discount those baby steps, though..they might be more useful than you think. Let us know how you're doing.

I agree with @j5 - making new positive memories will help too.


Whatever you do, don't destroy Alderaan just to demonstrate your power. It doesn't end well.


Uh, I have no power, and I'm so NOT a Vader. But I can see how my anger can interfere with my Jedi training.


I unload my weapons, hide the ammo from myself and drink heavily. YMMV.


Give it time. And yes, vent, whether it be a full on rage fest in the place or finding something equivalent to an effigy to kick, hit with a bat, curse, pummel, stomp, etc. I've been reading people suggesting writing down things that worry you and ripping them up helps clear them out. Start ranting on paper and go. And as @j5 has said, make better memories. And maybe finding music that you like listening to enough that you'll listen to and enjoy as it propels you beyond your comfort zone. That's one that works for me.


@curli76: Good for you!! I think anger is better then fear, not as crippling. Baby steps are very good.


@robingraves: I find spending an hour or two at the range works better than hiding the ammo.


Despite it all, I am still just a rat in a cage.


plant some meth in the car of the person that caused the rage, and then report them anonymously to the police for being a meth dealer.


I believe in the healing power of forgiveness. Do you think forgiving your former landlord could be helpful?


Update: I talked to my therapist about it. My new assignment is to go hiking in the Palisades as often as possible until I'm not angry anymore. . .so I'm paying the guy for advice I can get right here on Woot!


I had slugs in an apartment once. They were all over. In the shower, sneaking into the kitchen. Gross. Some of my friends had some too. I know this is waaaay different then your situation. Just thought something here might help :
We made a joke of it. My friend bought me a glow in the dark slug ( which I have to this day) I bought them stuffed toy slugs.
Anything goofy slug related we got and just got silly about it.
I think finding the humor in any situation can help defuse the icky stuff.