questionsif you could work for woot, which position would…


Too many. Top picks:

- Graphic/Web designer (that's what I actually do)
- Copywriter (that level of creativity looks like a ton of work but a ton of fun)
- Captain of Industry and Progress (it would be nice to have a prestigious-sounding title)


According to the careers page, "What's the best job in the company? That's Lead Cheesecake Eater. Man, that guy has it made.". But I don't like cheesecake, so
I'd actually want ADQ's job. >:D
But "and if your salary was that of your current job" is a dealbreaker, I need at least $.25/hr to work for woot.


Easy. Wine Buyer. I want WineDavid's job. Cruise around California sampling wine, cheese, and gourmet foods.


That one is easy for me - buyer. It's what I do now and I'm very good at it. Nothing makes me giddier than scooping up a big order of stuff on the cheap. Yes I know it's kinda sad and lame ;)



I hear there is an open spot too! ;-)


CEO's administrative assistant


Community Advocate!

Oh, wait.


@cruelnv: here's a good test for the copywriter position: open a fresh pack of typing paper. Pick up the first sheet and start writing a story about the pack of typing paper itself. Then, do it again, but with an entirely different original story about the next sheet. Continue this way until the entire pack of typing paper has been written on/about. Your deadline is 12 hours away, except for the sheet in the middle, that's due in half an hour. Also, you have two hour-long meetings scheduled part-way through the day. ARE YOU A BAD ENOUGH DUDE?


Matt Rutledge's old office and position. Oh want his pet Orca's too.


@slydon: I've actually had a test that was similar to that on an I.Q. test; in that setting, it was kind of fun.

Something tells me I wouldn't be able to come up with 500 stories in 12 hours though... and if I did, someone is probably going to want to proof-read those. ;)


@gmwhit: That's so you would be able to have the authority to give me a raise right?


@slydon: I started with the sheet in the middle, haha.

Product: Wootco Premium Recycled Paper - 500 pack

White Field

Print #250/500

“I just don’t get it.”

“What do you mean you ‘don’t get it,’ Tom? It’s art. You can’t just look at the piece, you have to feel the piece.”

“I know that, Janice, but it’s just that…”


“Well, it looks fine and all, but there’s just nothing really to it. It’s just a white piece of paper taped to the wall with a light shining on it.”


@slydon: Continued...

“That is so like you, Tom. Sure, it may look like it’s just another piece of paper, but you have to understand that there’s more to it than that. Look at the choice of the paper used: that’s 100% recycled paper. This art is sustainable, Tom. And look how vivid the white is - you can’t just find that with any brand of recycled paper. No; that level of purity is how you know it’s a Wootco. On top of that, there’s the uniformity of the paper. So smooth and flawless that it’s guaranteed to prevent jamming and smears in any standard ink jet printers. The level of care that has gone into this series is truly amazing. It’s not just a piece of paper, Tom; it’s art meeting perfection in the form of paper.”


“I don’t know why I waste my time trying to explain these things to you, Tom.”

“…Is this because I said your dress looks ‘nice.’”



I would love to be a bargain hunter while sitting at home in my underwear. I would do a conga line with my dogs every time I find a new bargain to post-just to keep it fun ya know.


@gatzby: I guess that means the question for staff is "which position besides yours would you want"?


@mutedexposure: That'd be a lot of dancing during the day. CAN YOU HANDLE IT? :)


@lichme: Yes, of course. And other actions, too.

An aside: Many years ago 2 devs worked for me (among other employees). One was young & well-educated; the other, older & experienced. When I explained what I needed, the older one listened, asked pertinent questions & went to do his part of the job. The younger one asked dozens of unrelated questions, and went off to run around in circles & accomplish nothing. The older one ended up w/the entire project. I found a position elsewhere for the younger one.

Of note: This is not intended to infer anything about you. Nor does it mean that older is better than younger. The 2 salient points to me: listen carefully & ask the right questions. A rewarding side effect: It'll also boost your rep, but you knew that, didn't you?

Not going to happen, but if I were to work at woot, I would like to be in charge of deals.woot. The ONLY remaining part that still has the woot! flavor.


Does woot have a Games Coordinator? If so I'll take that job. If not, make it up- You don't even need to pay me, just cover the prizes.

By the way- It's the last wednesday of the month next week and I have a huge DWChat game planned for it. Hopefully if all goes well It should take about an hour to play. Very excited for it and will be working out some of the details and will post more about it when I get home. Should announce details for it next Tuesday, keep an eye out!


@wilfbrim: You can buy the wine buyer, I'll be the wine taster. Someone needs to keep you in check and make sure you are buying the good stuff!


I hunter? Buyer?
Copywriter would have been fun until @snapster quadrupled the workload with the Woot-plus and sport.woot additions.

Oooh, I know...T-shirt Squeegee Operator


ha! like they'd ever hire me.


Can I please be the Office Slut? I have references ;)


nekkid bonfire dancing coordinator.

-because the hard workers need an occasional diversion


I'd be the one who had to approve deal tags, my rule, ALL FUNNY TAGS GET TO STAY!


Project Manager. and I'd relocate to Seattle if the pay was right.


I would love to be a photographer and designer. I am a 43 year old male forced to change careers( do to a faulty back) from manual to light lifting. I have been slowly teaching myself design and such for my career change. Once I saw your forum or question. I had to answer since apparently a group of monkeys run Woot then with my 20+ years of professional experience I should be a shoe in. I do worry about a momkey that might have the ability to tie his own shoes...he might have a jump on me. however I have such confidence in myself. I will be able to that within the next two weeks!


@thenativesarerestless: We already have one of those. Last month's bonfire was fantastic until someone threw a box of monkeys in. Exploding monkeys everywhere... their dying electronic screams... The horror... the horror....


I would want to be @jumbowoot. He seems to make everyone happy with his awesome gifts!


I want all the power with none of the responsibility.


I'd like to be the buyer that's responsible for buying the monkeys so I can buy a ton of the good monkeys and never go back to the garbage monkeys of late.



BOC filler. I would guarantee happiness for all!


I would definitely be a field product tester

Otherwise I'd just be the office sidler


I'd want to be the BOC!

Really, I doubt I could work there in any capacity, I'd be running around stealing monkeys from everyone and shooting them all over the place! It's what I do half the time at work now, I could just imagine having hundreds of them around me evil laugh