questionswhy do 4 year olds find *the* most annoying sound…


Sure, I can tell you. You just probably aren't going to like the answer. You're the parent. Sit him down (he's FOUR, and he knows better), and tell him that it's annoying, and that he needs to stop, or there will be consequences. Then carry it out.

It's that easy. BTDT. Multiple times.


I have to concur with shrdlu. All kids try to push the limits of their boundaries and if you don't set boundaries and enforce them, they will continue to do anything you let them get away with. When my son was that age, He had a special place for when he misbehaved. (The 3rd step on the stairs.) All I'd have to do was point, and he'd walk over, sit down and start bawling. I'd go into the living room and turn the volume up on the TV or stereo until he stopped crying. Then I'd give him another 5 minutes or so, call him over and ask if he knew what he did wrong and if was going to do it again. After that, I'd give him a hug, tell him I loved him, and let him go about his business. And he never repeated the same misbehavior. He'd always find another way to push his limits, but that's par for the course with any kid.


The answer is simply that he's four!

Don't need any other reason!


It isn't just four year olds that exhibit this type of behavior.


I'm one of those parents that feels the need to discuss everything with my kids. I've talked to him about it quite a few times, as has my wife, and it just doesn't seem to sink in.

I've got to figure something out. I have two icy thumbs that are being pressed into the back of my skull and the only think I can attribute this headache to is the constant noise that he produces.

edit: The "related deals" algorithm has one hell of a sense of humor. It's showing me two deals for scotch and one for a tent.


@mtm2: But it DOES need to be corrected.


He's a pretty sharp little guy and understands and participates in conversations I have with him about ill behavior. Usually it doesn't take a whole lot to get things to sink in with him, which is why I can't figure out why we can't get over this one.

Maybe, "Hey buddy, let's tone that down a little, okay. We need to use our inside voices, because you're making dad feel like his head's about to implode," is just motivation for him to do it more?

Time outs don't seem to work on my kids, I don't like to yell at them and swatting their butts is generally saved to correct something that is going to do them harm. Aside from a couple mid-store/restaurant ass beatings, that's how my parents handled things and I'm not an axe murder or child molester, so it must have done some good.

No offense meant to any axe murderers or child molesters that may be reading this.


I agree with @shrdlu. Nip it in the bud now. Redirection does work, but not always the way you want it to. Let him do the "WEEEE-OOOO" thing in his room at set times. Say, "For 5 minutes, you can make the noises you want, in your room. When I call you, it is time to stop." Then for redirection, teach him quiet things. I taught my daughter to make faces. Lots of them. We spent a lot of time at the doctors office where she had to be quiet. She is 17 now, and still makes faces. Has taught all of her friends throughout the years to make these incredible faces. BTW, I also taught her sign language for redirection.


When he goes outside to play, let him be loud and make wee-woo sounds if he wants, you could even join in. Inside has 'indoor voices' the play yard is different.


A few years ago drinking at my friends house was a weekly routine. Often I'd crash on the couch. Every time, 5AM the next morning, her ~2 year old would stack blocks, playdough and such on me. After the pile was complete she'd start yelling, "cockadoodledoo!! cockadoodledoo!!" until I woke up and toys went flying.


@matt1976: He's FOUR. His brain is not yet capable of abstract thought. Abstract thought happens at around age eight; sometimes it shows a bit earlier, or later, but that's a good age to expect comprehension for the talking that you're doing right now.

You are the parent. Sometimes you just have to look your child in the eye, and let him know that you're in charge. This is one of those times. It goes right along with the teenage years, when you ought to hear "I hate you! I can't wait until I'm old enough to move out on my own, and make my OWN rules!" at least a few times. You might even hear it daily.

Please trust me in this one. Children really want boundaries. They feel safer with them. You can't be a friend to your child; you have to be the parent.


@mtm2: before I even clicked on this question those words are EXACTLY what I was thinking.

Kids are going to be kids. You did the same stuff when you were 1,2,3,4,5,etc.

I find mis-direction best for a child under 4 as they really don't know why they shouldn't do something. Unless it is dangerous, for instance my 2-year old nephew will look at an outlet and say "ouchie" or look at the stove and say "hot hot".. and stay clear of it. but when he's just screaming at the top of his lungs, I might pull out one of his favorite toys and start playing with it to mis-direct his current state of screaming into playing.


What you're dealing with is attention-getting behavior (btw, EVERY sound can be the most annoying when repeated and loud). And it's working--for him. He screams, he gets your attention.

Two ways out.

A) Don't give in. Don't give him attention (even negative attention) and instead give attention when he's doing the activities you want to encourage. Easier said than done, I know, but there is no easy way out;

B) Work on teaching his time-outs (much like the sitting on the step). Eventually, you'll work up to a minute per year of age, but start with 30 seconds. Count to five to let him correct his actions and use a kitchen timer. He has to stay in one place, quietly, until the time goes off. Your first 30 seconds time-out may last half an hour. It's harder to get going, but perseverance will help set-up time-outs which you can use for many issues later. Eventually, you'll just have to start counting.

Good luck, it's not easy being a parent
(from your local pediatrician.woot)


@duxbak99: I agree and don't agree with this. Of course the child wants attention, the child is 4 years old. Some parents need to pay more attention to their children instead of their Touchpad/TV/Gaming System/and dare I say it... woot sites! (cringe)


You've gotten some excellent advice here already, so I'll just toss out one of my "last ditch" fun things to try. If you can't beat them, join them! :-D Run around after him making the same noise for awhile or try to drown him out banging on a pan lid. Make a game out of it for a bit then find something else fun to do. Unless you have cranky neighbors...then follow the other Wooter's advice. LOL

-signed Mom of 4 and GrandMom of 8 :-)


@gregorylikescheapstu: Well, that's better than putting your hand in a bowl of warm water.......


@matt1976: I believe that @shrdlu has the only answer you really need in this situation. Whatever form of punishment you choose, follow through with it.

I would tell my son, "Stop! If you do not stop doing 'X', 'Y' will happen to you." Then, if he didn't stop, I'd send him to his room (or someplace for him to wait to think about what he did). I'd take time to calm myself down (you never want to discipline when you are angry). Then, ask him if he knows why he is there, talk to him about why I asked him to wait and think about what he did. That's when, no matter his answer, I'd carry out 'Y'. But never never never do 'Y' out of anger.

I'm not a parent, and I would never tell anyone how to raise their child, and this is not me telling you how you should discipline your child. This is just me telling you exactly how my parents disciplined me when I was a child, and I think I turned out pretty good, so why change a good thing...right?

Good luck to you, I CAN wait to be in your shoes.


@jimeezlady: My wife used the 'can't beat 'em, join 'em' idea when my daughter had colic.


You can always borrow my duct tape.


@devexityspace: I actually am encouraging more interaction. Time-outs are hardly fire-and-forget punishments (especially at first). Instead, I'd advocating giving that attention during the times the child is acting in a manner we want to support. "The squeaky wheel gets the grease" and it's often tempting to give oneself a break (and check woot) when a child is acting the way we want them to, but that precisely when we have to set our things aside.


@duxbak99: heh the comment wasn't targeted at you, just a general comment for the parents that do not give their children the attention that is needed.

Everyone has their own style, and while "burn out" can happen in the first 5 years of a child's life, that is what Nap Time is for :) But I would rather spend time with my child than do anything else. Even cleaning up the house with a 2-year old who wants to "help" with everything makes every task take 4x as long. Do I mind taking that extra time? Not really. Am I thanking the heavens when Nap Time hits! (Sometimes very much so!) lol


This is an interesting thread. It is a microcosm of all the different parenting styles in my circle of friends. And the style that consistently results in the happiest, most secure and well adjusted kids and parents is the "set boundaries/enforce consequences" one (with authority, but not anger).

The method that is the hardest on kids, parents and their marriages is the appease/re-direct/sleep-in-the-same-bed-with-the-kid method. Usually at around 18 - 24 months, children understand consequences, so take advantage of that. Short term sacrifice, long term gain.

Fortunately my child is perfect and has never needed discipline.


@devexityspace: Sorry if there's any misunderstanding: I'm with you on every word.


Ignore everyone else! You may have found the next Skrillex! Get him a Casio, stat!


It could be worse, he could be making this noise:

In case you were wondering, it's an excerpt from this:


@1298ty: He can press play really well.


he is 4 years old,u have to join him........