questionshow do you balance your family, home, and work…

vote-for26vote-against
vote-for3vote-against

Don't always balance it so well. But I try to get done what HAS to be done, and to be where I HAVE to be; everything else is details.

I try to put the family first, but if I don't get the work done I can't pay for the things the family needs/wants.

vote-for3vote-against

I think it's great that you're seeking to have some balance, but the reality is that a lot of times our lives won't be - simply because of the different seasons we are in. So as you enter a new season, you may need to shift some things around with your schedule.

That said, you've GOT to identify what is most important to you. Let's say family is most important. Is your current schedule healthy for your family? Or does it keep everyone so busy that you're not actually able to be & grow as a family?

It may come down to making some tough decisions. We want to say "yes" to so many things. Two principles to keep in mind:

1) When you say "yes" to something, you say "no" to something else.
2) Saying "no" to something, even good things, means you can say "yes" to the most important things.

Hope that's something to chew on.

vote-for2vote-against

I don't have kids or family locally, but I do have a lot of friends and a very active life outside of work. So I'm balancing different, but similar things.
What works for me is keeping a fairly strict schedule. I'm at work the same time every day. I try to leave about the same time every day. Everyone at work knows I keep that schedule. I will stay late/work weekends if needed and if I'm able to rearrange things (having advanced warning or at least a day or two, especially if it's going to mean working over the weekend) helps a lot.
There are also a few things outside of my work that I will not compromise on. And everyone at work knows that I have these (and my immediate supervisor knows what they are, at least as much as he needs to). And everyone is okay with that. Having an understanding manager helps.

As for balancing all of the stuff outside of work, it's a matter of lots lots of to-do lists, planning and some prioritization. Some things are more important than vacuuming.

vote-for1vote-against

Very easily. Subtract kids, subtract church. Still sometimes very full, but definitely not as hectic.

Good luck getting it organized.

vote-for3vote-against

don't see what the big deal is with that schedule...

we have 3 kids, Kid 1 has taekwondo mon-fri for at least an hour, drama club 2:45-3:45 on mondays, and girl scouts for an hour wed evening, and school 8-2 Mon-Fri.
Kid 2 has soccer on mon evening, gymnastics on tuesday 3:30-5:00, girl scouts on thursday evening, and kindergarden 8:30-12:00 mon-fri.
Kid 3 is only 2.5 yr old, so only has play group from 10-11 2 days per week.
We also have church sunday morning.

monday-wed can be pretty hectic, but we eat dinner together as a family at least 5-6 days per week, and the kids have plenty of free time to just play with their friends or each other.

This is all one of the reasons there should be two parents around, if possible.

vote-for2vote-against

Easy. Cut out sleep and you'll have several more hours in the day. :)

vote-for2vote-against

Is this a newer schedule? If so, it takes time to get used to changes. If you have been struggling with it for a while, then I suggest you try a few different techniques to lessen the stress:

1. If you have a cellphone you constantly have on you, be sure to set reminders. I set reminders for everything 2 hours ahead of time. This "prepares" me for what is coming up and serves as a reminder. There are also many types of free tools out there for managing time such as apps, etc.

2. Schedule in time for you - whether it is for a date night with your significant other or reading time. Be sure you place these as important as well because this is really what helps you maintain your sanity.

vote-for2vote-against

3. Put the kids to work! Look at things that they can do and if they do not already do it, put it on their "to-do". My 5 year old keeps his toys out of the living room area, keeps his room clean, vacuums, feeds his animal, keeps his bathroom clean, puts his clothes away when they are folded, etc. This took a lot of work (considering he has ADHD and ODD!) but it is showing him responsibility and he feels a sense of pride. It might not seem like a lot but when you add it all up, he really is a big help! This might free up some time because you will not have to constantly be picking up after everybody - which is usually a job in itself!

4. Something I found when I really analyzed my time is that a lot of time was beign wasted. In order to catch yourself doing things, write down everything you do for a week. Keeping a list will allow you to look at where your time is actually being spent.

vote-for2vote-against

I knew someone that was constantly complaining she did not have enough time and she found out between Facebook and literally starring at the computer screen "surfing the web" every day, she was killing 3 hours! She had no idea she was spending that much time doing it.

5. Be sure to split things up fairly if there are 2 of you. It is often times hard (and stressfull) to handle everything yourself. If you have a significant other in picture, be sure to sit down with them and include them in the day. Find out who does what better with the kids. For example, I am better reading books my son has to read for school with him than dad is - so dad takes the written work that he has to do. This way, he gets both of us interacting with him, showing him schoolwork is important and I start making dinner while dad does the written work.

Sorry this is so long, but hopefully some of this helps - if nothing else, step back and see where all your time is beign spent.

vote-for2vote-against

I don't. It's mostly chaos, especially the past few months.
What little free time I get I hide and enjoy the quiet.

vote-for2vote-against

Well it's 7:15 pm and I'm at the office, probably have 2-3 more hours here. I left the house at 7:15am. Tomorrow I'll leave at 6 to be on-site at 7:30am. I might get out early around 2-3pm only to go home, pick up my daughter and take a ride out to another site to do some layout.

It's great working for a small company.

vote-for1vote-against

@kamikazeken: i agree, two parents make juggling easier.

My friend is a single dad, sometimes I feel for him, then other times when his kid is at the sitter and he is dating the 4th different woman in a month I don't feel so bad. Surprisingly, there are a lot of single women 30+ years old, even in rural areas. lots of single moms divorcees widows etc.

vote-for1vote-against

My answer is simple, you have to make time for yourself. If you don't, you are eventually going to get tired of the running or get angry about taking care of others' needs first. I go to the gym 3 days a week, twice for 1.5-2 hours, and saturdays its 3 hours. Sometimes the kids come with me, many times they do not.

I ensure that I clear my schedule, absent emergency work situations, that I perform transportation duties to various sport and social gatherings.

Having someone else, and the occassional family member available on standby makes life easier.

Last year it was chaotic, to the point things were getting stressful. Some activities were cut from the list. Things improved dramatically.

vote-for1vote-against

I've found that as I also work overtime, the work and the sleep take up huge gobs of my day. I'm usually left with about 5 hours of free time during the week, but that's also the same time I use to run errands, go to stuff, etc. I spend those hours with my family.

Acceptance is what it's come down to. Acceptance that life as an adult is a lot of work, that those games I want to play will take forever to play because of how much work is always to be done, that I can't sacrifice sleep because everything else suffers, that maybe the Xbox doesn't get turned on for weeks because as fun as it is, it can't be a priority. For now, anyway.

vote-for1vote-against

I'm thinking, it is almost impossible to include a woot-off in this schedule! LOL