dealstony little destress massager for $10.00 + free…

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Narrator: Was it ticking?

Airport Security Officer: Actually, throwers don't worry about ticking 'cause modern bombs don't tick.

Narrator: Sorry, throwers?

Airport Security Officer: Baggage handlers. But when a suitcase vibrates, then the throwers gotta call the police.

Narrator: My suitcase was vibrating?

Airport Security Officer: Nine times out of ten it's an electric razor. But … every once in a while [looks around, leans in conspiratorially] … it's a dildo. [leans back] Of course, it's company policy never to imply ownership in the event of a dildo. We have to use the indefinite article, "a dildo", never … your dildo.

Narrator: I don't own a dildo!

If you buy this you will own a vibrating dildo...

//Fight Club