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What Does Your Woot Behavior Say About You?

Did you know your Woot behavior can shed light on your psychological profile? It's true! We certainly wouldn't make such a thing up to pass the time while the site is down. Just take this handy quiz and find out where you stand. Psychologically!

  1. My Woot username is:
    1. A clever joke or pun, because I'm so lighthearted and fun loving!
    2. My name or initials, or close to it, because I'm orderly and neat.
    3. A random jumble of characters I can't even remember because I'm chaotic and unfocused.
    4. A thinly-veiled threat to murder you, because I'm aggressive and sadistic.
  2. The items I'm most likely to buy on Woot sites are:
    1. Silly toys for my desk, because I like to play!
    2. Computer accessories to help me stay organized.
    3. Whatever's cheap! I don't even need the stuff! I just like my house to be cluttered.
    4. Sharp things, to maim and kill with. Because I like to maim and kill.
  3. When the site goes down, I:
    1. Make up some joke about the servers and log on to an internet forum to crack up all my friends!
    2. Note it in my daily journal of internet happenings.
    3. Mash all the keys on my keyboard until a new site pops up!
    4. Take out my frustrations on the guy I keep chained up in my basement.
  4. In the forums, I'm usually:
    1. Cracking jokes with my fellow Wooters about the silly writeup or whatever goofy thing it is they're selling.
    2. Posting detailed schematics and specs for the product in question to best inform the potential customers.
    3. Fighting with the mods over probating me for posting my HILARIOUS collection of .GIFs.
    4. Threatening bodily harm on the next idiot that dares to imply the product could be found cheaper somewhere else.
  5. When my BOC comes in the mail, I:
    1. Laugh jauntily at all of the silly things inside. They put the wackiest stuff in those boxes!
    2. Itemize and photograph the contents, then place them in an online photo album for documentation.
    3. Throw it away! It didn't even matter to me when I ordered it. I just like to be weird!
    4. Abduct the UPS guy and stuff him in a trunk in my garage.

Now count up your answers, and use our handy Answer Key to unlock the mysteries of your psyche.

  1. If you answered mostly A, you're a wild and crazy person! You're the life of the party, or at least you really want to be. This means you probably suffer from a crippling fear of rejection and thus have a co-dependent personality. Tweet your result
  2. If you answered mostly B, you're a detail-oriented type of person, blinded to the majesty of the world by your obsession with minutiae. You're likely a social outcast, or at least really annoying to everyone around you. Tweet your result
  3. If you answered mostly C, you're an attention-starved teenager who will do anything to seem "random," despite not knowing what that word really means. Grow up. Tweet your result
  4. If you answered mostly D, congratulations! You're a perfectly well-rounded individual, with lots of potential for success in life! Go get 'em, go getter! Tweet your result

This video is from the vaults. Any sales or events it refers to are probably OLD.

As the Woot Turns

Episode 1: All My Kids

"I'm not going to lie to you, buddy. I think the handcuffs were a bit much."

Jake said nothing. He hadn't spoken a word since Michelle had walked into the principal's office to discuss what was being referred to as "The Incident." Even now as they drove away from the school, he simply stared at the mountains of Argentina, trying to make sense of the day's events.

"I suppose I don't even have to ask where you got them," she said. "Alex, right? I swear, one of these days, I'm going to hire a real babysitter so he can only corrupt you on holidays and birthday like a normal uncle. I just hope he has the key."

Aliens. It must've been aliens that took Ms. Estes, he thought. Why else would no one explain where she'd gone? What other possible reason could the school have for replacing her with what was a clearly a robot disguised as a teacher? Yeah, that made sense. The school's been working with the aliens all along! No wonder they were so quick to suspend him for the day. Any kid loyal to Ms. Estes is probably a threat to their awful plans.

"And don't take this the wrong way," his mother continued, "because I'd REALLY rather you not continue this kind of behavior, but if you're going to protest something by handcuffing yourself to something, you might be better off doing it to something like a radiator or a big heavy desk. Not, say, a large globe."

Michelle sighed and glanced at him in the rear-view mirror. "I know you're upset about Ms. Estes leaving so suddenly, kiddo, but acting like a jerk isn't going to bring her back."

Jake wondered if the aliens might have taken his favorite teacher ever away to Iceland. Iceland looked nice.

To be continued...

This video is from the vaults. Any sales or events it refers to are probably OLD.

Deals Without Woot

$18.75 for $33 worth of pet massage at Ruff Treatment Salon

DWoW!

From The Drawing Board: Rejected Woot Redesigns

The mid-90s retro craze is just around the corner, so we thought about getting a jump on it with this paleo-web design. But the public just isn't ready for it - or maybe they're too ready...

Click to view full size.

This video is from the vaults. Any sales or events it refers to are probably OLD.

Woot Moments in History

240 B.C.E., XI'AN, CHINA.
Young artesian Li Tedg Rut finishes the first of what will be thousands of terra cotta figures, placing it for sale outside his shop, next to a sign that reads "ONE DAY ONLY! LIMIT THREE PER CUSTOMER!" Word spreads across the "Silk Road" and sales grow throughout the day. By evening, Li Tedg Rut has attracted the attention of Qin Shi Huang, and the Emperor agrees to fund a small warehouse from which shipping of the terra cotta army can be coordinated. Six weeks after that, the Emperor receives a small, cleverly-written scroll apologizing for the delay and offering him a special coupon code to be used with his next purchase of any style terra cotta figurine.

1590, VIRGINIA.
Colonist Ananias Rutledge is faced with a harsh decision. Wait for his countrymen to return from England with supplies? Or relocate to a nearby island to survive the winter? Ultimately he decides on the latter, but inadvertently discovers the power of clever copywriting when he carves "CROATOAN" onto a nearby tree. Soon all known civilization is buzzing about the strange-sounding word and donations pour in to the account of Bnanias Rutledge, Ananias' previously unknown identical cousin. Within the year, Bnanias retires rich! Sadly, Ananias is never seen again, but his word is fondly remembered to this day.

This video is from the vaults. Any sales or events it refers to are probably OLD.

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